Dead Bodies, a Comedy
Ladies
and Gentlemen of the Cinemah—
For
almost everyone reading this is a filmmaker—
Hitchcock has amusing takes on the corpse, and everything he does is two
thirds comedy.
Of
course the very idea of having a body is a little spooky.
May
I, therefore, invite you to a picnic in a graveyard?
After
that we can see a movie, which we
may like so much we buy the book, and rent
the play.
I
will not disguise from you that we plan on making a lot of money with this.
With such sincerity as I can manage,
Robert
Robert MacLean is an independent filmmaker. His recent The Light Touch is on Amazon Prime, Tubi and Scanbox, and his 7-minute comedy is an out-loud laugh. He is also a novelist, a playwright, a blogger, a YouTuber, a film reviewer, a literary critic, and a stand-up comic poet. Born Toronto, PhD McGill, taught at Canadian universities, too cold, live Greece, Irish citizen. No brains, but an intellectual snob.
Foreign Matter
Toby travels with a woman who pays. He's got it made, except that her nine-year-old daughter is smarter than he is. Based on the novel:
“A very, very funny book"—The West Coast Review of Books
“Enormously enjoyable”—Kirkus Reviews
“Fresh and spirited”—Publishers Weekly
Think of:
Proposed cast: Paul Rudd
Toby Tucker gets along as a tour guide,
though all he knows how to do is keep the clients amused. In Venice he
falls for rich bubble-head Marcie but can't afford her style. "To-bee! Let's just live on my money!" Well—it’s awkward but what can one say? He reclines into the good life.
Proposed cast: Leslie Mann
Marcie Harding, sweet, fresh, blonder
than blonde and all heart, is a lonely widow who takes a tour in
Venice. Toby abandons the tour to take her to Rome, and when he
runs out of cash is about to abandon her. He loves her more than he knows.
Proposed cast: Amber Liddicoat
But for Andrea, things would be
perfect. "The child." Toby and Marcie are no smarter than anybody
else; the child is smarter than anybody else. She'd have got rid of
him long ago but her mommy loves him, so she keeps him around to, how
shall I say, play with. When you’re not looking she rotates her head like Linda Blair.
Proposed cast: John Goodman
Marcie’s father-in-law, billionaire
Hazelton Turnbull “Hard Turd” Harding IV, loathes Toby, and loathes
giving Marcie her allowance to feed him. But he loves his little
granddaughter, and there lies the control.
When Haze spends Marcie’s money on a painting for the Harding Memorial Museum it looks like Toby's meal ticket is gone.
Proposed cast Pamela Shaw:
Proposed cast Pamela Shaw:
Johna Nerg is the butch-nightmare artist
whose painting Toby accidentally steps in, sits in and sets on fire.
He really doesn't mean it but she thinks, as who does not, that he's
trying to destroy it—and gets real mean with him.
He has no choice, finally, but to try to steal it. But until the child takes a hand, nothing works.
Light, charming, sophisticated, and the first of a series, each set in a new pleasure zone. Total Moisture, one of the sequels, is set in the south of France:
Foreign Matter is set in Venice and on a Greek island, and is available at Amazon US, Amazon UK, Amazon Germany, Smashwords, and the usual places: Apple, iTunes, Barnes and Noble, Sony, Kobo, Diesel—the whole street.
Pretentious Pictures presents a summer comedy.
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