Then he drives his red Cadillac convertible—such a show-off!—to Tuscany, where he stops to visit his old friend Alfredo, and his beautiful, ah, so beautiful wife Angela. "This is Del. He's—what are you in, Del?" "Futures," smiles Del.
When he alights his wings fold and disappear, and as he walks into the Vatican Palace his simple black clothes transform into gold-trimmed purple and a crimson cape, magnificent horns sprout on his head, and a mustache and goatee point his features demonically. Nuns and priests cross themselves.
At the hotel he tells Angela he wants her to seduce the Pope and she refuses. He takes her flying over the city and threatens to drop her unless she agrees, but she defies him and she falls a long long way. Then he catches her. "That was fun," she says, "let's do it again!" She knows he loves her, and agrees to do what he asks, to torture him with jealousy.
In the dungeon he whips Angela in anger. She asks to see the Pope, not to comply with Del's wishes but to confess, and he, sensing a way in, brings the Pope to her. But she is pregnant with the Devil's child, and the Pope wants her to abort it, which horrifies her.
Back in the Vatican the Pope studies maps of the ancient sewers and sends the police and the Swiss Guards down there after her. They bring her back, but the doctors want to kill the monster that is coming quickly to term in her.
She escapes, chased through the sewers by the police and then, when the river rises to the vaults, by Del's zombies marching relentlessly under water after her, and down the Tiber to Ostia, where she gives birth into the sea to an eight-foot monster that attacks her.
And we're just getting started.
Robert MacLean is an independent filmmaker. His recent The Light Touch is on Amazon Prime, Tubi and Scanbox, and his 7-minute comedy is an out-loud laugh. He is also a novelist, a playwright, a blogger, a YouTuber, a film reviewer, a literary critic, and a stand-up comic poet. Born Toronto, PhD McGill, taught at Canadian universities, too cold, live Greece, Irish citizen. No brains, but an intellectual snob.
“I was beastly but never coarse. A high-class sort of heel.”














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